Dad Squared

Happy Fathers Day.  I am fortunate to have been around long enough to be the Dad of both a Dad and a Mom. 37 Dad’s Days under my belt now, but I feel like I’m a beginner, because here I am sharing something I am just recently coming to understand about it.

Being a Grandpa can be like a refresher course for what you are supposed to learn, a sort of Dads for Dummies. I think I am benefiting from it. I think the first time around, I missed a good deal of mutually beneficial engagement, because I thought I had “bigger fish to fry.” Over time, the “big fish” faded into nothing and were forgotten, and the “small fish” grew up and became hugely important. The other thing is that even if I had not misjudged the size of the fish, I would have tried to “fry” them the wrong way.

As the adult preceding these young, destined to be great and profound souls, you think of all the things you learned and all the values and wisdom you know that they will need. You think they should get it now, sooner better than later, so just get right down to it, it should be simple, just get them to sit quietly and take a down-load of all the things you think are important, really cool and interesting stuff like faith, courage, patience, hard work, discipline and self control. Well Dad, Gramps, or whoever you may be, such a download is not possible!

These are not little computers, and even if they were, the security on the network that you would try to do such a download on is way too tough. There must be a trust, a reliable connection, and don’t forget a shared interest-one they can “share” with you first, not you with them. Relax Dad, or Gramps, they will get most of what you want them to learn, but you really need to have them teach you about their cool and interesting stuff, like Skylanders, Minecraft, Phineas and Ferb, and the Incredibles. All the kinds of stuff I used to think would make my head explode is really good fun, not to mention the doorway to a great relationship and to leaving a meaningful legacy of success and happiness to those who come after.